I just came out of a week that I’m certain could qualify me for an Emotional Support Dog.
My diagnosis would be PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).
I felt a pain in my ribs that sent me into a tailspin of cancer dooms day so bad I called my doctor and practically demanded my blood be drawn and a hospital bed be reserved in my name.
Let’s back it up here. You see, my entire journey began when I thought I pulled a rib and went months treating it like I had pulled a muscle doing a cool disco move, when actually they were being broken one by one by cancer eating away at my bone marrow.
Fast forward to a cancer diagnosis.
The thing about cancer is, you’re in survival mode. Emotions, those are child’s play, no time for those, no energy for those, until there is.
A pain in my rib area made all those really deep ones come pouring out. I believe there is a time in the journey that the magnitude of it all just hits you and no one except the one’s who are on the same path can really understand. Believe me, I’ve tried to explain it a million times to my poor husband.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, because it gave me the clarity to own my feelings and get them out. I went into the weekend feeling better as some of my labs came back good and I now have a new perspective to share with others.
And while I am certain there is some validity in all of us having PTSD, I think for now I’m going to hold off registering Spike, he’s still having his own flashbacks of his time locked in a Vietnamese breeding kennel.